Some Smiles to You

God Saw you hungry & created McDonalds, Wendy's, and Dairy Queen.

He saw you thirsty & created Coke, Juice, Coffee and Water.

GOD saw you in the dark & created Light.

GOD saw you without a Good looking, adorable, FRIEND...

so He created ME

Send this on to your good friends

who are so lucky to have YOU

       for a friend also !!!!

Five Rules to Remember in Life:

1. Money cannot buy happiness, but its more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes than on a bicycle.
2. Forgive your enemy, but remember the bastard's name.
3. Help someone when they are in trouble and they will remember you when they're in trouble again.
4. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.
5. Alcohol does not solve any problems, but then again, neither does milk.

All I Need To Know I Learned From The Easter Bunny

Everything I Need to Know, I Learned From the Easter Bunny...

Don't put all your eggs in one basket.

 

Walk softly and carry a big carrot.

Everyone needs a friend who is all ears.

There's no such thing as too much candy.

All work and no play can make you a basket case.

A cute little tail attracts a lot of attention.

Everyone is entitled to a bad hare day.

Let happy thoughts multiply Like rabbits.

Some body parts should be floppy.

 

Keep your paws off other people's jellybeans.

 

Good things come in small-sugarcoated packages.

The grass is greener in someone else's basket.

 

An Easter bonnet can cover the wildest hare.

To show your true colors, You have to come out of your shell.

The best things in life Are still sweet and gooey. 

Jose Cuervo Christmas Cookies

1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup or brown sugar
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups of dried fruit
1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequila

Sample the Cuervo to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the Cuervo again, to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.

Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.

Add one peastoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point it's best to make sure the Cuervo is still ok, try another cup just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy.

Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

Pick the frigging fruit off the floor.

Mix on the turner.

If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaters just pry it loose with a drewscriver.

Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity.

Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Who geeves a sheet. Check the Jose Cuervo. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

Add one table.

Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find.

Greash the oven.

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.

Don't forget to beat off the turner.

Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Cose Juervo and make sure to put the stove in the wishdasher.

 
Cherry Mistmas !

A Chocolate Bar Story

On , wanted  to .

So he took Miss to a  and then to the Motel on   to show her some  .

He began to feel her  , which was pure .

It made her , and made him want to  .

He thought "This is

 !"

He let out a  as his went up her and caused a  .

She screamed  '', as she grabbed his  and squeezed his  .

Miss said; 'You are even better than the '.

To which replied; 'When you're this size they call you .

Now  and we'll have some  again'.

Soon she was a bit  and nine months later she had a .